Having just moved to England less than 3 months ago and after 7 years (a lifetime!) in Ireland, really turned my world upside down. As I knew it would. I have done this before. Several times in fact. Pack up and go. Start over. However, as much as "you know it" in your brain, in every tiny cell of your body, there is just not enough preparing your soul for it. Somehow, some bit of vital information gets lost in transit between your head and your heart. When your chest hurts from the crushing and ripping pain of missing your friends and your home, it just doesn't help to have your mind saying "but you knew this!" Reality is we can't control it all. And that, for me, is frightening. It's like drowning. I know I should just surrender, let my body float and I would be ok, but it's so hard to let go...so I kick and punch and gasp for air in a exhausting and helpless fight for life. This was my last three months. Every single day. But not today. Today something else happened. Today after so long thinking about all the things I have lost, all the things I don't have and I can't do anymore...today something else happened. I went for a walk in the woods and I got lost. Seriously lost! And it was like drowning. So familiar. But what was different was that, this time, I just couldn't allow it. I mean, I couldn't stay in the woods for the night! And I couldn't blame anyone for it or hope to be saved by someone. There was just me. And my choice. Choice. How I dread, fear, avoid that word. In my darkest moments, a choice to be made is like a shadow that moves and grows with no warning. That feeds itself on your fear and adopts the shape of all hunting thoughts. I could sense its weight today in the woods. As I tried to find my way back, I asked myself "what can I do now?" These were the words that I heard inside my head, over and over again. "What can I do now?" First I was only thinking about trees and trails but as I relaxed into my walk a shift of conscience and perspective happened and a parallel between my life situation and being lost in the woods started to emerge. "what can I do now?" I can walk in the woods and enjoy it, hug the trees, I can stop and soak up the sun between the branches...I have time now! I can read and write, I can take pictures, I can meditate. I can wake up early and I can stay in bed for a while. I can practice my yoga. I can go swimming. I can learn new things. I can iron my sheets and clean my kitchen cabinets. I can study for my English exam and I can work on my blog. And that is the story of how I got here today. The story of finding my way back to madebycata. I have a big list of things I cannot do with my blog and in my life in general, but what I CAN do today is offer you this words and this picture of the little gifts I'm working on.
With my kind of attention span and scattered over-excited mind, I tend to start too many projects together and what happens then is a always growing pile of "one-of-this-days-I-finish-it" projects collecting dust in the corner. That is ok too, I think, After all, we only doing this mainly for ourselves, and always for fun, right?! People that know me know that I'm a bit of a perfectionist and I tend to take too much on board, setting the expectations on myself too high. That can then turn into a source of stress and frustration when I just can't make it all! With my sewing and other crafts I want to be free of that. "It's only for fun" I say to myself. "Are you having fun? If the answer is no, move away from it now". And so the piles pile on. Who cares? And you know when something is piling on in the corner, It can be that project to finish, or maybe that diet you mean to start 6 months ago, or that book, or that phone call...the more you leave it there, the more you think you should be doing it, the more you feel ALLergic to it!! Ha! Any way, this is the story of my unfinished yoga bags, piling for the last 6 months.
Then last week, I finished them all in one go. Just like that. No drama, no fighting, no anxiety attack. It's a great feeling :D
You know what you can do when you hurt your back and the doctor's orders are "lay flat for 20h a day"?.... Well, besides the obvious answer - Go Insane!...... There is also.... Shop online!!! :D Hurray for Paypal!! So this is what I've been investing my sickly-time on....yuMMy!!! Can't wait to have a go at them! The delicious colours! The endless possibilities!! Weeeee!! And for the time being, really enjoying just playing with them! :)
But! They weren't my only web-sin! Oh No Sir! There was more indeed.... In fact, something so delicious that I couldn't resist having a little snip at it.... It's my next project (one of them bunch, course) and here's a little tease! Can you guess what is it going to be??...;)
Aren't the colourful vespas just Divine?? The fabric is this amazing +lovely +soft+ vibrant-colours cotton on one side and waterproof kind of soft oil cloth on the other side! I just love it! I wanna wear it! I want a skirt/dress/top out of it!! :D As always, my web-splurges are all done on etsy.com. What can I say about it? It's just genius. And serious, serious temptation!! Go have a look a it and let yourself be inspired! You might be my type of girl: Buy first ('cas it's SOOO gorgeous!!!) Figure out what to do with it later :P
Yes, I'm still around! Wow! It took me a wile, hein? Between moving house and having a sore, sore back injury!.. Phew! I mean, this business of moving houses is no fun, you know what I mean? It might just take a weekend or tree days tops to move all your stuff into the new place, witch seams no big deal, right? And then another...week? or too? to put all your stuff into their news places,again, piece of cake! but then you realize that your head, your mind and spirit need to move house as well!... You wake up and for a split second you don't know where you are... You take the wrong turn on your way home from work to the "old house"... Your routines are all suspended in time and space because somehow they don't seem to fit...You just can't shake that feeling of being "all over the place"! Grrrr!!! Not fun! So, even if in this house I have a room ONLY for me and my sewing machine and my yarns and my buttons (YeY!!!) they were just sitting there for the last month! Because also, 2 weeks ago, I hurt my back! One of those muscular nasty injuries that Oh My are so sore, and then, there is nothing else you can do but lay on your back!! :( But I sarted to feel better by the end of last week and Yesterday, breakthrough! I finished a bag that was waiting patiently for have her handles fitted :) It looks lovely and I'm so happy I'm starting to feel myself again, slowly getting back to my routines and the little things that bring colour and joy to my days. Thanks for having me back! :D
As a Easter treat for all my blog-friends, I put together the soap-cozy tutorial (improved recipe!). Why not?! Soap, eggs, bunnies, chocolate, chicks, all random sweet little things, all very "Eastery" :) Besides, spring is officially here and I think this small project is indeed very Spring appropriate! So here it is! Happy hooky-Spring-Easter-time!!
Work 8ch and join with slst forming a ring. 6ch (counts as 1dc,3ch)
[1dc,3ch] 7times. Join with slst into 3rd of 3ch. You should have 8 dc each separated by 3ch.
Change colours. (If you fancy). Join new colour to any 3ch space. Follow the picture instructions. Repeat in all 3ch spaces until you make 8 petals. At the end do not join.
Without joining the last petal, 5ch.
Very important step now! You'll be working on the reverse of your flower! Follow the pictures.
See? You building the foundations where your second row of petals will go. Clever!
This is a view of the reverse of your flower. You should have 8 5ch loops!
Now we start work on your 1st 5ch loop do make the 1st of 8 petals. Follow the picture.
8 petals on the 2nd row of petals? perfect!
Now, do not join and 7ch.
Just like before, work 8 loops, behind each petal, this time of 7ch each loop.
Work your 3rd row of petals. Follow the pictures.
Ta-DAHHH!! Lovely flower!! Now start all over again and make another one! (yep, I'm serious!)
OR, just play around with your masterpiece! Find it new purposes ;)
I made two (Lola didn't really like the new hat...)
Now just have to figure out how I'm crocheting them together around a soap!.....hum...
But before, I'm going to play a bit more with my flowers :)
See how they match the flower arrangements I have in the house?
Ok, back to work now!
What I did was a row of sc all around the back of each flower, and on top of it a row of dc. Like this:
Then a row of slst joining the two flowers, with my lovely-smelling soap in the middle :)
Happy-happy spring teamed Crochet!!
And now back to more playing! Weeeeee!! I love matching my buttons with my projects!
I made (nearly) 2 new bags today! I have two late-very late- birthday presents to send home!
The "Japanese Dolls" fabric is from mwendas on Etsy. She has some sweet stuff!! The purse frame is the last of the set of 5 I bought. I will miss them...:( I made the pouch like the others I Blogged about. See the tutorial here. Then I had the idea of using snaps to hold the pouch on to the bag like this. I'm liking it! ;)
Paco having a sniff at it :D
This next bag is a really special one and it was soooo much fun to make! It was my first waterproof fabric sewing experience and...I loved it!! I love the way it feels under the needle and the way it holds its weight when it's done. So cool! I'm not sure what to do regarding handles yet...Ummm....
Clashing lining is my religion :)
The Summer is arriving, I have worn my first last-summer's clothes and for the first time this year, flip-flops! I'm dreaming with the idea of having a handmade bag for each of my Summer outfits!....;)